Amazing weekend

So I wanted to post a little about Adam and my wonderful weekend in West Virginia. I arrived on Friday afternoon after spending the night in Charlotte with the always-lovely Jess Whalen. Her apartment is super cute, folks...reminded me of Carrie Bradshaw meets Martha Stewart. She also took me to this awesome little Mexican restaurant that is famous for its fish tacos, so I tried one not knowing if I would like it. It was DELICIOUS. I don't know if theirs are something special, but wow, I might be giving up the chicken and beef for fish tacos from now on.

Anyway, I left Charlotte on Friday morning and arrived in Morgantown just before 3pm. Adam stayed with Elroy on Thursday night (since he doesn't have an apartment anymore) and as I was driving up the street to the house, I actually started crying. I'm not really sure why, I think I was just overcome with all of the emotion of thinking I wasn't going to see him again for so long, and then the surprise of getting to see him, and the exhaustion of not being able to sleep the night before followed by the long ride. As soon as he came out of the house, there I was, boo-hooing all over his shoulder and snotting on his shirt. Of course he just laughed...that's Adam. And I just kept saying "But I'm HAPPY, I don't know why I'm crying."

That afternoon we went and picked up his diplomas since he wasn't able to attend graduation, and had lunch/dinner at the Boston Beanery. I let Adam pick pretty much every place we ate because he kept saying how much he missed certain places in Morgantown. After BB, we went to check in to our hotel and found out that his friend's brother (who is a valet there) had booked us a room on the "Private Access Floor" for only $70 a night! We got valet parking, a king suite, AND a Sleep Number bed, which I proceeded to play with for 20 minutes after we got into the room. Also, we had our own conceirge and a private "concerige lounge" where we were served breakfast each morning and could get snacks like soda, chips, and fruit all day. They also put out things every afternoon like mini quiches, pasta salads, and cookies. The room had a river view and a big TV, and a bathroom big enough for BOTH of us to get ready at one time (which we don't have here at the house). Overall, this hotel experience was so much more than we possibly could have expected.

We ate at Casa D'Amici, Black Bear, and the Regatta Bar and Grille. We had dinner at Oliverio's and got a couple's massage to celebrate our birthdays (mine coming up in July, his in August). We had martinis at the Vintage Room and walked along the river on the Rail Trail, holding hands and talking about how great it was to just be together again. We ordered dessert from room service on our last night there to just revel in each other and this amazing experience for a few minutes more. I can't begin to explain how good this time was for our marriage--it reminded us all over again of just how much we love each other, and how blessed we are to have found each other. It also gave us something very special to look forward to when Adam returns from Iraq.

The saddest part of the trip, obviously, was leaving. I had to drop Adam at the Clarksburg Airport, and, as I drove up, I was overwhelmed at the sight of all of the military families milling around outside. When I went in to use the bathroom, women were in there crying, wiping off smudged eyeliner and blowing their noses. In the terminal, kids hung onto their dads' legs and cried, as moms tried to explain that it was ok. Standing there, I had a moment that I was certainly not expecting: I was humbled. Ever since we received the news about Adam being deployed, I've had a bit of a chip on my shoulder. Yes, I've accepted that this is part of his/our life, and I'm doing the best I can to keep living a normal life. However, I haven't been able to shake the feeling that this just isn't fair, that Adam and I DESERVE more than this, we deserve to get to live together the way that married people do, especially after so many years of living apart. But standing there in the airport, I realized all of a sudden that we are just one of many military family stories. We don't deserve this any more or any less than the guy we saw whose wife had a baby last week, or the couple who just found out they're pregnant, or the mother who was saying goodbye to her only child. In that moment it felt like I had been punched in the gut for being so self-centered.

As the next year plays out, I think the image of all of those families saying goodbye will come back to me when I begin to focus on how much it sucks to have Adam gone. It sucks for everyone involved, and feeling sorry for myself/us will not make it any easier. I am not saying that we're not allowed to have tough days, but it's hard to feel as bitter as I was feeling when you suddenly realize that you're one of many.

D